Joseph Lease
Torn and Frayed

I felt like winter, I felt like Jell-O—we lost the word virtue, we lost the word sister, two hundred years of dark garden—it happens so fast—believe me (I know you won’t)—teeth in coffee, dentures in piss—it happens so fast—might as well, might as well let night in—

just laughing in a bus—

*

“You just want to die I mean capitalism just wants to kill you I mean you just want and you just want—”


                            Bright
                                     Branches

                            Your

                            Kisses
                                    Your

                            Darkness
                            Your
                                    Sky

*

You, you, you, you, you. Six when there’s mist in the street, eight when your mouth starts to fade, nine when the drug starts to work, two when you hate yourself more. Three when you hate yourself more. Good old blank page. Slow down, green whisper, dry whiskers, ordinary twilight, ordinary, less hope. I wish I was Ezra Pound’s towel. America, you can’t be greed, America, you’re only greed, America, one extra summer night—I wanted to (you know) feel like a giant eyeball—

*

“I tell you I was the stars. What do you care. I tell you I was a green pool on a summer night, heat driving everybody nuts. What do you care. I tell you just some more of this whiskey.”

*

                            We
                                 Try to

                            Tell the
                                 Truth

                            And rain

                            And wrens
                                 And blue

                            Traces of snow in the
                            Rain
                            Deep
                            Autumn soft
                            Sung moons

*

Some image torn into strips, February morning. New Hampshire. Did you notice the bag on the dirt, did you notice—the golden retriever and no one is near—I was to be the dog. The faithful pup. And the dark was blue. And the blue was dark. We’ve all seen bodies before: contact all the fires of dawn, exaggerate, distort my angels: perhaps the big sister, steely and confident, perhaps the ordinary zombie, humdrum lost soul—

*

                            How
                            Shall I tell
                            You
                            How shall
                            I

*

Donna dreamt about Skip and when she told me she said I’m so glad I’m with you: great, thought I: my love is dreaming about her ex and I find that comforting: here’s the joke—These memories, which are my life—for we possess nothing certainly except the past—were always with me, says Charles—

I can’t remember anything—past the crust and down to the human, down to the want and want and want—

*
                           
                            Your

                            Kisses
                                  Your

                            Darkness
                            Your
                                  Sky

                            You are
                            Strong very
                            Strong very
                            And words
                            And lost
                            And found
                            And blue
                            And
                            Green